Shall I Give You Despair Or Love?
by TheDarkHarbinger
Summary: Just a tearjerker from my imagination. Rated T for very mild language and some depressing scenes.


"Are you really leaving?" She couldn't even look at the taller man beside her. "Shira, I have to. It's my duty." Shira sighed. "I know, Seph, but I just don't know what I'm going to do without you." Tears were escaping from her eyes. "We will see each other again. I can promise you that." She felt his brilliant green eyes staring at her. "Please, please don't cry, Shira." Sephiroth grasped her hand. "You're my best friend, and you always will be. I will come back." Shira looked down at their intertwined hands. "Sephiroth. Promise me on more thing." She let out a heavy sigh. "Anything." The grip on her hand grew tighter, letting her know that he would do anything for her. "When you become a famous hero, don't forget about me. If I'm ever in a bind... I want my hero to come save me." Sephiroth looked away from her, trying to hold back tears. "I promise." He felt her arms wrap around his body and her head fall against his arm. "Thank you." Sephiroth looked up at the night sky. "Look Shira. A full moon." He was right, in fact it was brighter and fuller than normal. Her arms were still around him but she didn't care and neither did he. Shira pointed out in front of them at a trunk coming towards them. "I didn't think they would be here so early." Sephiroth slowly stood up. It was so hard to leave her alone, but he couldn't let his emotions get in the way. The truck stopped in front of them. "Sephiroth?" The driver spat rather rudely. "I'll see you again, Shira. Take care of the town for me." And with that, he kissed her forehead and heaved himself into the back of the truck with three more men. Shira held her hand out, not wanting him to leave, but it was too late to go back now. "Shira!"

"Sephiroth!" He heard someone yell. "Sephiroth. Wake up!... I think he's having a bad dream." "Sephiroth, get up!" He felt someone shove him, making him jump to attention. "What happened?" He was confused and didn't recognize his surroundings. "You were having a bad dream." Zack and Cloud were in front of him. "Whatever..." He grumbled, obviously wanting to be left alone. The tall man stood up. "Where the hell are we?" Zack chuckled. "You don't remember leaving? We're in Banora." Sephiroth looked disgusted. He might not have been too nice to a lot of people, but Zack considered him a friend. Sometimes, he can catch Sephiroth on a good day but this didn't look like one of them. "Well, Zack. I'm going to go downstairs." Cloud waved to Sephiroth and Zack and went downstairs. Zack grinned and pulled up a chair next to his friend. "Hey, Sephiroth?" He grunted. Zack didn't know if this was a good grunt or a bad grunt, but whatever. "Who's Shira?" He knew, right when he asked, it was a bad idea. Sephiroth glared at him. "Why?" He lay his head down on the window sill he fell asleep at. "Well, you talk in your sleep sometimes." Zack braced himself for what was to come next. "A girl."

_Whoa. He actually answered my question? Maybe I can get more out of him._

"Do you want to talk about it?" Zack was a compassionate guy, and Sephiroth knew that. In fact, he considered him a friend also. "If you want to listen." Zack smiled at the obviously stressed man beside him. "When I was young, around six years old, I had a close friend. Her name was Shira. She was always there for me. Her mother pretty much adopted me. I didn't have a family." He took a few breathes and continued. "Shira and her mother made me the Masamune. They were great to me. But Shira. She was one of a kind. I've never met someone so compassionate and nice, and..." He broke off. "Well, anyways. We always played together. I was 2 years older than her but it didn't matter. I always dreamed of being in SOLDIER, and so did she. We would always pretend we were in SOLDER, and she was always my sidekick. We were friends for years, but as we grew older, our urge to join SOLDIER did too, but when she was 10 they didn't allow women in SOLDER anymore, and she didn't want to join the Turks... Who does?" He chuckled a bit, but it was forced. Zack could tell he wanted to cry, and it made him want to cry. To see such a big guy like Sephiroth cry... He didn't even want to think of it. "Her mother was such a great woman. She supported me in joining. Shira was heartbroken, but she supported me just as much, if not more. So, the year of my 17th birthday, I enlisted and got in. A part of me was hoping they didn't accept me, but it was always my dream." Zack seemed to understand everything he was saying. He was young, but he wasn't stupid. Zack knew Sephiroth was in love with this girl. "The night I left... Was what I was dreaming about. Shira was there with me... At _our_ spot." He emphasized the word our. "She had me promise that when I became a hero, I would go save her if she ever needed it. But, Zack. I'm not the same guy I was 8 years ago." Zack knew he was leaving a lot out of his story, but he didn't want to push Sephiroth anymore. He told him all that, and that was more than he would ever tell anyone else. "Zack. That is between you and me." And with that, he bolted out of the chair he was sitting in and went downstairs and out the front door of the Inn.

_I thought a bit of fresh air would help, but no. That's not what I need._

He knew what he needed, but he couldn't show his face to Shira and her mother now. All these years, no writing, no phone calls. He wanted to scream. He wanted to let everything go and just forget, but that's impossible. He drew his Masumune out and stroked the blade. **Beep! **His phone beeped loudly. He flipped it open and read the new message.

**Attention SOLDIERS:**

It seems Kinja is pretty tricky. He had a copy of himself here in Banora, trying to throw us off track. He's now somewhere near Nibelheim. We're not sure what he's up to there, but we need you to head there as soon as possible. Thank you and good luck.

-Shin-Ra.

Before Sephiroth even called for them, all his SOLIDERs were behind him, ready to dispatch. "We're ready General." __

General.

Zack walked up beside him. "Let's do this." Sephiroth grinned and got into the nearby truck, Zack in the passengers seat and everyone else packed into the back. While Zack and Sephiroth conversed in the truck, the SOLDIERs in back were commenting about how much of an honor it was to work with the famous Sephiroth. He never liked to hear "famous", or "hero" because he didn't see himself as any of that. Though he was a bit different, he didn't think he was any better than anyone else. That was just his attitude. "So, Seph. What are you doing after this mission?"

_Seph._

He hadn't been called that in years... Since Shira. "Not sure. Probably just going to stay in Midgar. What about you?" Zack chuckled. "I'm goin' to Costa De Sol. I've always wanted to go there. The water there is so clear unlike the beaches around here." Sephiroth laughed a long with him. "Sir! Ahead!" They heard one of the 2nds call from behind. Sephiroths smile turned into a gasp. There was a huge fire ahead. "Nibelheim..." He said under his breath. They followed the fire, and sure enough, Nibelheim was in flames. Zack and Sephiroth bolted out of the truck with a pack of SOLDIERs behind them. "Get these flames out! Check every house!" Sephiroth was yelling orders to everyone. Sephiroth ran to the all too familiar house which was engulfed in flames. He heard a faint scream upstairs. His heart pounded with rage. He didn't even notice the heat of the flames beating across his face. He shot up the stairs and saw her. She was surrounded by flames. Her eyes couldn't open and she was bleeding. "Shira..." Sephiroth jumped through the flames and grabbed her. "Help me..." She could barely talk. Her eye lids were covered in blood and her lungs were full of smoke. Not sure of where to go, he jumped out of the window with her in his arms. "Shira... Everything is going to be alright." She was unconscious at that point. Zack ran out of the Inn with a little girl in his arms, burnt and bleeding. There was nothing else to do but let it burn. They got the survivors and they had to treat them quickly. Sephiroth ordered everyone back into the truck. Zack took his place in the passengers seat with the little girl in his arms still. He was crying. "Zack. Everything is going to be alright. Stay focused, and hope for the best." Sephiroth was trying to comfort him. Halfway back to Headquarters, Shira woke up. "Where am I? Am I blind!? Who are you?" Sephiroth looked down at her beautiful, but severely burned face. "You'll be alright." The girl in his lap coughed. It sounded horrible. "That voice..." Sephiroth flinched. He really didn't want her to know who he was. He was ashamed. She fell back to sleep. "Shira!" Zack yelled. "We need you to stay awake. You might have had a concussion. You can't go to sleep." Zacks cheeks were tear stained. Sephiroth looked down at the little girl. She had died... He knew how Zack felt. "It's all part of the job, Zack..." Sephiroth looked at him with a friendliness. Zack nodded and hugged the little girl. Once they got in the vicinity of Shin-Ra they jumped out and ran into the giant building. Sephiroth rushed Shira to the Infirmary with SOLDIERs behind him with their survivors. There was already a doctor there to take them. "Mr. Sephiroth. I'm sorry, but you can't be in here."

_Shira... If only I had kept my promise you'd be alright... This is all my fault._

"Hey Seph... How are you holding up?" He heard Zack behind him. "Zack, I don't think she's going to make it..." He put his head down. "Zack... Do you know something?" Sephiroth eyed him. "Sephiroth. She had several concussions from passing out..." Sephiroth braced himself. "She's in a coma..." Zack looked away from him. The look on his face was unbearable. He loved her.

_How could you do this to a man like Sephiroth? He never had anyone to listen to him like she did. I could never picture Sephiroth in love with anybody, but he is, and she gets taken away from him. Curse you, planet, curse you._

Sephiroth visited her seemingly lifeless body everyday, talking to her. Telling her how he really felt. How much he loved her, how sorry he is for not keeping his promise, how beautiful she looks. It was a scene you just couldn't watch.

One night, while he was alone in his room, just laying down, looking up at the ceiling. He heard her. He heard her tell him she loved him, and she always will, and she'd be waiting. Waiting for him in the lifestream. And it was at that moment that she had passed. He went downstairs to her now lifeless body and kissed her one last time. He didn't cry though, for he knew she was watching him. He knew she loved him, and she would be waiting for him when his time was up, and that was comforting to him.

"Shira, the funeral was beautiful. But, you know that. I saw you there. You were smiling when I stood up to the podium and told our story. I felt your arms around me. I felt your soft lips against my cheek. You were there. Zack saw you too. He saw you leave. He said you're beautiful, and you know what? I have to agree, Shira. You were always beautiful to me. I love you, and I promise, we'll be together soon enough."


End file.
